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First, the ELECTION-THEMED LINKS:

David Foster Wallace on why I’m pissed at my fian – I mean, why you should vote.

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Who would these great authors have voted for? Ayn Rand’s not much of a question mark, but how about Virginia Woolf? Or Allen Ginsberg?

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Seven Literary Characters Sociopathic Enough to Run for President

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Finally, this is by far my favorite joke to come out of this presidential election, or possibly any election. Ever.

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EVERYTHING ELSE:

The internet is blowing up with this news: Philip Roth says he’s done his best with what he has, and he is satisfied with his body of work as it stands. He will not write anymore. In all honesty, without having read anything more recent of his, I really, really, felt while I was reading it that Everyman was going to be the end for him, one way or another.

Meanwhile, two posthumous bits by Ray Bradbury will be published this fall.

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I’m willing to see the film adaptation of World War Z; I’m just wondering if I’ll be able to get anyone to come with me.

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There was a lot of hoopla over the past week about Bram Stoker’s 165th birthday. There are a few things you may not have known about Bram Stoker, but here’s the juicy part for your convenience:

Dracula is a very sexy novel, so we weren’t surprised to learn of your lustful courtship of Florence Balcombe. You wed the English lady in 1878, after she chose you over Oscar Wilde (Count Dracula also appears to swing both ways). Through Wilde, you met Walt Whitman, Alfred Lord Tennyson, Mark Twain, Arthur Conan Doyle, and Teddy Roosevelt.

Also, 10 Famous Vampires in Art and covers of Dracula.

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Powers’ The Yellow Birds, which opens with the line “The war tried to kill us in the spring”, is one of three novels chosen by judges for this year’s shortlist, alongside Scottish writer Kerry Hudson’s Tony Hogan Bought Me an Ice-cream Float Before He Stole My Ma, the story of a childhood in council flats and B&Bs, and American novelist Chad Harbach’s highly acclaimed debut, The Art of Fielding, about a talented baseball player… and it continues from there.

The shortlist has been announced for the Guardian first book award; see the results here, because they look awesome.

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What was so special about the 2012 World Fantasy awards, anyway? A lot, apparently.

When the World Fantasy award for best novel went to Lavie Tidhar‘s groundbreaking Osama at the weekend, it was a triumph on a number of levels.

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Nevertheless, I’m convinced horror can raise its game. Our postmodern, capitalism-in-crisis, media-saturated world is ripe to describe it anew. Our very language seems to demand it. A mortgage, literally, is a death grip. Negative equity means being haunted by your own house. Corporations have legal personhood: they can be held responsible for criminal actions and claim “human” rights, but ironically they have no body. PR and political spin are referred to as “dark arts”. Your computer can be a zombie, “possessed” by a Trojan virus. Charley Douglass started to make canned laughter in 1953 – and it’s still in use. Every episode of Friends is accompanied by the cachinnation of the dead.

I totally, totally get where we’re going with this, and I am completely ambivalent. I am laughing hysterically at the absolute horror of this. I guess they’re on to something here.

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In my mind, the benefits of online magazines are obvious but I still can’t get past this:

At the end of the day, though, while online magazines are a great place to start, there’s just something very rewarding about being able to own a printed book with your story or poetry in it.

It just feels legit.

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10 Facts About the Brothers Grimm and frightening memories and facts about Roald Dahl.

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The 10 most difficult books to finish does not include American Psycho. Apparently they’re “intellectually” challenging, not just challenging to keep your lunch down.

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Bookish convos the HuffPost also never wants to have again. Never one for moderation, I strongly agree with #10, 6, 3, 2, and 1. However…

9) It’s worth repeating that publishing is even more doomed when Britney Spears is writing novels – I don’t care if Snooki has already published a book.

8) Literary hashtag games are still great as long as they make me laugh. Or at least snort.

7) As long as we’re not talking about the same one or two lists over and over, I do want to know why there aren’t more women in these lists.

5) I always love these. I always check them for books to add to the wish list.

4) True, but the worse the author responses are to their reviews, the funnier it is to me.

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K-Stew on 50 Shades of Grey:

“I’ve skimmed parts of it,” Stewart told Backstage in a new cover story. “When I read the first few pages describing her messy hair, I was like, ‘This is so strange.’ But it’s just so raunchy! I mean, obviously, everyone knows that. But when I see people reading it on planes and stuff, I’m genuinely creeped out. Like, you’re basically just reading porn right now! Get that blanket off your lap!”

Fo’ realz? I’ve said it a hundred times, but anyone who equates 50 Shades with porn is just too, too naive to worry about. Or, obviously, hasn’t read it.

That’s why I’m more than a little disturbed by the fact that this abuse charity is using 50 Shades as toilet paper. Are we blowing this out of proportion a teensy bit, maybe? I’m fortunate to have never been a victim of any form of abuse, but I can’t help but imagine that, had I been, I would be insulted by a comparison between a real-life abusive situation and 50 Shades of Grey.

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Check out how slick and shiny and commercial-y U.S. book covers are compared to U.K. book covers.

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This right here is why parents need to step off and leave the teaching to the teachers.

Sarah Timme was reviewing her son’s homework one night when she discovered he’d been assigned the 1924 short story “The Most Dangerous Game” by Richard Connell. She was so upset, she’s asked for the story to be withdrawn from the curriculum, according to a story on Huffington Post.

By the way, I read it in high school and I teach it.

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I haven’t read it yet, but Ken Liu’s “Paper Menagerie” is supposed to be pretty good.

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The Disturbing Origins of 10 Famous Fairy Tales

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Five great Pride and Prejudice adaptations.

I had never heard of this “Lizzie Bennet Diaries” thing before, so I guess I’ll have to check that out now.